Surrender
I am not perfect but I am guarded by perfection. Sometimes I can get so overwhelmed in my day to day activities I ignore who I have on my side. I am learning to actually trust God because he hasn't steered me wrong yet and always keeps his promises so why can't I keep mine? I fall sometimes but God quickly snatches me back up from the wickedness of my old thinking patterns and ways. I HAVE EXPERIENCED IT. For example, today I drunk some tea while doing some work and I knew I had set items to finish, the tea made me sleepy and I was nodding off until I HEARD "stand up" and I did, then I heard "sit down" then "stand up" and I stood up for awhile until I heard again "sit down". After following that I had energy and completed my work! Y'all just probably thinking all she did was stand up, nah I LISTENED. If I don't follow the simple directions and solutions how could I possibly trust Him when the bigger ones arise? Sometimes God tells me to do things that I don't understand but I have to TRUST MY INTUITION (INNER G) no matter what. This has been so hard for me because I don't want to do things from an egoic place until I realize I am the ego. I have to get out my own way, if I didn't follow directions I would've probably went to sleep knowing I had shit to do. My poems seem to have an underlying theme of telling my future. My most recent poem I posted was written September 15, the day I wrote I was going to write a book about God which has now turned into a blog! (Still writing the book though!) After reading some of my entries after that all I did was write about listening and trusting God. It be the reflection and realizations for me LOL. "Devil (I) on my mind but he won't lead me astray." How can I not listen? How can I not trust Him? How can I not? I haven't felt this good for years and all I can do now is smile and love because I am loved by the creator of all things. All I have to do is listen because I can hear the voice, the true one. The one that tells me to do random things and I find happiness and wholeness on the journey to my destination wherever that may be. I never know what I might run into if I just listen and have the willpower to execute.
I could only enter the Kingdom of Heaven as a child. I am HIS CHILD! So I have to listen and follow directions like one with no hesitation back. Jesus was a manifestation of a fallen angel that came back to show me THE WAY it is not a physical person IT'S ME. I was the fallen angel. I have to bear my own cross. Jesus and the Devil was both called the morning star. The 12 disciples are in my brain, I am them. “I” was Judas, the nigga that turned on God for 30 pieces of silver! Thinking that money was going to take all my problems away. Do we not see this played out today? Niggas killing they BESTFRIENDS for money? People selling out they people for a dollar? Pause... that was off the dome God gives me understanding and clarity about HERSTORY FR! Lucifer was Gods favorite angel until he turned on him thinking he was going to be bigger than him. Why you think ALL people have egos? The Devil had an ego too, the first person to have an ego. I been repeating history, energy cannot be created or destroyed only manipulated! Ecclesiastes 1:9 THERE IS NOTHING NEW UNDER THE SUN. I told y'all once you seek God He will show you why you got put in this existence! He came back as Jesus when he got kicked out of Heaven and he was GODS FAVORITE! I had to realize I was the angel that turned my back on God and even through all that He still came when I called. That's why I say I turn to Him for everything it's scary being in Hell physically with y'all niggas but I'm in his presence HE SAVES ME FROM MY DAY TO DAY!
I had to release my understanding because I knew nothing. Lucifer is called the light bearer didn't Jesus say in scripture he was The Way, The Truth, and The Light? John 10:9 "I am the gate. If anyone enters through me, he will be saved." I have to go through Hell to reach the Heavens. When I drop my story who can refute it? Who can explain to me differently? Don't read this thinking that I am talking about anything outside of myself. ALL THIS IS ME. Don't believe me though, you have to see it for yourself! I am not perfect, I did terrible things, but I am back in Heaven and nobody will take me up out this mf but me! I was in Hell, I had to walk through that fire! I can see why my grandma made me read Pslams 23 before I went to bed. She was programming me all along. I LOVE YOU GG. She showed me that there is a Heaven.
The biggest trick the Devil ever played was convincing y'all he didn't exist. Look in the mirror.
I love y'all!
🔐❤️
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