The Axe Forgets But The Tree Remembers
I died today.
The way I thought about death is very different than now. I thought death was outside of myself, when someone is dead they lose their 5 senses but what if I told you we die everyday and all the time? You can experience death in this lifetime. I die when I let go of old habits, when I do something new, when I write, and when I go to someones funeral for example. How could this be? First, let me describe it as something outside of myself then connect it within. When someone dies, apart of ourselves die because we are losing the person we were when they were here. When I get rid of old habits the part of me that did that habit dies because I am not in the present moment doing it. We see death as something scary when it truly is liberating once you can inner stand the process. When we sleep we die, we relinquish the yesterday and create a for today. When you read this the person you were before not reading this has died. In death you gain life with the life you have gained why are you trying to cling onto the dead you? So many people wish they were the "old them" that person has died and that is why you can never mimic that old self hence if you could you wouldn't be wishing for it back. Why do we cling onto aspects of ourselves that have died? When the God in you is giving you a chance in the present to create yourself a better you which in turn gives you a cleansing of the spirit.
I say I died today because I did. When I gain new knowledge my old thinking has died but today it feels different. For the past few weeks I had a knowingness in my heart that I was going through a rebirth so in this time of realization I need to reinvent and get clarity on what God wants for me and this space. I cannot lean on my own understanding anymore. I have to actually trust God in all aspects of my life down to what I'm going to fucking eat! Isn't that crazy? Our egos are so strong it got us telling ourselves what we should eat I could only realize this when I became the observer. Becoming the observer is having awareness or consciousness. Everyone has had that moment in life when they're like, " what the fuck am I doing with my life?" That is awareness, that is the awareness that you let your choices go unnoticed and now the fate of those choices are realized. Now you over here scrambling trying to "fix your life". Here you go leaning on your own understanding AGAIN.
I wrote my Tree of Life poem last night while I was at work. Reflecting on it made me realize that my spirit is the Tree and I killed myself by putting my humanity before my Spirit. My spirit is dirty because of me, I am having to clean it everyday, every SECOND actually. That's why I say be careful when you dealing with God because he will show YOU how YOU have KILLED your spirit. I could either run from it or embrace the darkness because I am the light that liberates my demons or egos. No pill could do that for me. Taking those anti-depressants is like giving a dog melatonin to take him to the vet and when he wakes up he's angrier than ever. (I see why Jesus wrote in parables lol) . It's a saying the axe forgets but the tree remembers. My soul remembered the hurt I brung it but the AXE aka ME forgot so this is why I do this work so my spirit brings the light to my sins and forgives the demons I let control it.
Spirit also wrote this poem because I had an ego that was afraid of death. Even if we don't always think about death when someone else dies we become afraid of "am I going to be next?" I had to understand my ancestors knew death was better than bondage, bondage being tied to this world. In death you will be just fine but if you ain't learn shit you'll be back to try again in this lifetime and the next until you get it right because God leaves nobody behind. Whew!!!!! Ain't God so merciful and so patient with you niggas? He is within all of us and our relationships towards Him are personal and need to be cultivated. You won't get into the Kingdom of Heaven with my name nor will you get into it by just reading this OR JUST BEING BLACK. You have to do the work for yourself. God don't see that you're black that's HUMAN SHIT, God sees the light your spirit reflects. God has never been human so why would.. you know what never mind LOL!
I have to understand this type of inner work is for your SOUL not your humanity. I am here on Earth physically but my soul can now flow throughout existence experiencing things the eye cannot see and it can go back home to my Heavenly Father whenever it chooses! This why I say this work isn't about Paeshyns. I don't make being human my personality trait being in the flesh is disgusting! I have to die so I don't go back to hurting you niggas because I am hurt! My soul cares about y'all but Paeshyns don't! What Rick Ross say? God forgives, I don't!
So I ask you to ponder on this how do you know you're not dead?
I love y'all.
🔐❤️🔥
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